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HENRY A. PARSONS, Jr., Editor and Publisher. NIL PESPERANDTJM. - Two Dollars per Annum.
v YOL. VII. BIDGWAY, ELK COUNTY, PA., THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 29, 1877. NoTil.
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1:
The Former's Sceptre.
BY JOEL BENTON
A giantess, when pagan folk
Held all the world In sway,
, Looked from a hill one sunny morn
Acios the fields of May.
The song of birds was in the air
The winds with balm were sweet
Her daughter, rosy-cheeked and fair,
Was playing at her feet.
Boon runs with glee the little one
From slope to slope away ;
She holds the summor In her arms,
- The streams and fields of May.
The child could step from hill to vale,
And as she wildly ran
She saw beneath her towering stride
The busy husbandman.
His oxen, plow, and him she took
Within her apron's space,
And, baxtenlng with the portent queer,
She sought her mother's face.
" Oh mother ! thou hast told me much
I did not understand,
Now tell me what this beetle is
Which wriggles through the sand."
" O, child," the giautess replied,
" Go, put it back again (
These are the stern forerunners of
The patient race of men.
" In other realms, my little one,
Our home henceforth must stand,
For these who come in lit' lenews
Have come to rule the land."
A Scandinavian legend.
How tie Weathercoct fas Oilei.
" I'm game to do it," says Billy John
son, " any time you like."
"Not yon," Bays Joey Ranee. "It
ain't in yon."
Ain't it?" Krt- a Billv.
And ns ho spoke lie took a pull at his
strap, aud Parson says
"My good man I couldn't think of
allowing it."
You see, this is how it was. We'd got
a 'weathercock a-top of our church spire
tit High Bcechy; and it was a cock in
real earnest, just like the great Dorking
in Farmer Granger's yard ; only the one
on the spire was gilt, and shone in the
enn quite beautiful.
There was another difference, though.
Fanner Granger's Dorking used to crow
in the morn, and sometimes on a moon
light night; but the gilt one a-top of the
Bteeple, after going on swinging round,
and round, to show quifctly which win
the wind blew, took it into its bend to
stick fast in cnlin went her, while in a
rough wind oh, lor' a' mercy I the way
it would screech and groan was enough
to alarm the neighborhood, and alarm
the neighborhood it did.
. I wouldn't believe an it was the
weathercock at firnt, but quite took to
old Mother Bonnett's notion as it was
signs of the times, and a kind of warn
ing to Zligh Beechy of something terri
blo to come to pass.
But, there, when you stood aud saw it
turning slowly round in the broad day
light, and heard it squeal, why, you
couldn't help yourself, but were bonud
to believe.
Just about that time a chap as called
himself Steeple Jack not the real
Steeple Jack, you know, but an impostor
sort of fellow, who, we heard afterwards,
had been going about and getting sover
cigns to climb the spires, and oil the
weathercock, aud do a bit of repairs, and
then going off without doing anything
at all well; this fellow came to High
Beechy, and saw Parson, and offered to
go up, clean and sorape the weathercock
oil it and all, without scaffolding, for a
five pound note.
Parson said it was too much, nud con
sulted churchwarden Bound, who said
"ditto," and so Steeplejack did not get
the job even when he had come down to
three pound, and then to a sovereign ;
for, bless yon, we were too sharp for
him at High Beechy, and suspected that
all he wanted was the money, when, you
know, we couldn't have made him go
up, it being a risky job.
The weather cock went on squeaking
then awfully, till one afternoon when
we were out ou the green with the crick
eting tackle for practice, Parson being
with us, for we were going to play 11 mi
boro' Town next week, aud Parson v;s
our best bowler.
He was a thorough gentleniau was
Parson, and ho used to say he loved a i
gumc ul ujiciLi tin jliui'u eta ever, uiui an
to making ono of our eleven, he used to
do that, ho said, because he was then
sure no one would swear, or take more
than was good for him.
Speaking of our lot, I'm sure it made
us all respect Parsou the more ; nul I
tell you one thing it did beside, it
seemed to make him our friend to go to
in all kinds of trouble, and what's more,
it fetched all our lot in the cricket club
to church, when I'm afraid if it hadn't
been out of respect to Parson, we should
have stopped away.
Why, you may laugh at mo, but we
all of us loved our Parson, and he could
turn us all this way or that way with
his little finger.
Well, we were out on the green, as I
said, and the talk turned about oiling
the weather cook, and about how we'd
beard as Steeple Jack, as he called him
self, had undertaken to do Upper thorpe
steeple, as is thirty feet lower than ours,
and had got the money aud gone off.
"I thought he was a rogue," said Billy
Johnston. " He looked like it ; drink
ing sort of fellow. Tell you what, I'm
game to do it any time you like.
"Not you," said Joey Ranee. "It
ain't in you."
" Ain't it." says Billy, tightening his
belt, and then
" My good mau ." says Parsou. " I
couldn't think of allowing it."
You see, ours was a splendid spire,
standing altogether a hundred and
seventy feet six inches high; and as it
says in the old history, was a landmark
and a beacon to the couutry for miles
round. There was a square tower seventy
feet high, and out of this sprang tiie
spire, tapering up a hundred feet, and
certainly fine of the finest jij tl)
country,
"Oh, I'd let him go, sir," said Joey;
" he can climb like a squirrel."
" Or a tom-cat," says another.
"More like a monkey," says Sam
Rowley, our wicket-keeper.
" Never mind whit I can climb like,"
says Billy. " I'm game to do it; so here
goes."
"But if you do get up," said Parson,
"yon will want tools to take off and oil
the weather oock, and yon can't carry
them."
Just then a message oame from the
rectory that Parson was wanted, and
went away in a hurry; and no sooner
had he gone than there was no end of
chaff about Billy, which ended in his
pulling up his belt another hole, and
saying:
"I'm going."
" And what are you going to do when
you get up there ? '
" Nothing," he says, " but tie the
rope up to the top of the spire, and
leave it for some of you clever chaps to
do."
" What rope shall you use," I said.
"The new well rope," says Billy.
" Its over two hundred feet long."
Cricketing was set aside for that day,
for Joey Ranee went off and got the
rope, coming back with it coiled over
his arm, throwing it down before Billy
in a defiant sort of way, as much as to
say
" There, now, let's see you do it."
Without a word, Billy picked up the
coil of rope oud went m at the belfry
door, to come out soon after on the top
of the tower, and then, with one end of
the rope made into a loop and thrown
over his shoulders, ho went to oue edge
of the eight-sided spire and began to
climb up from crochet to crochet,
which were about a yard apart, and look
ing like so many ornamental knobs
sticking out from the spire.
We gave him a cheer as he bean to
go up, and then sat on the grass wonder
ing like to see how active and clever the
fellow was us he went up yard after
yard, climbing rapidly, aud seeming as
if he'd soon be at the top.
The whole of the village turned out
in a state of excitement, aud we had
hard work to keep two brave fellows
from going up to try at other corners of
the spire.
"He'll do it he'll do it 1" was the
cry over and over again.
And it seemed as if he would, for he
went on rapidly till he was within some
thirty feet of the top ; when all of a
sudden he seemed to lose his hold, and
come sliding rapidly down between two
rows of erockets faster and faster, till he
disappeared behind the parapet of the
tower.
We held our breath, one and all, as
we saw him fall, and a cold chill of hor
ror came upon ns. It was not until he
had reached the top of the tower that
we roused ourselves to run to the belfry
door and began to go up the spiral
staircase to get the poor fellow, whom
we expected to find half dead.
" Hallo I" cried Billy's voice, as we got
half-way down the cork-screw. "I'm
coming down."
" Ain't you hurt, then ?" cried Joey
Ranee.
" No, not much," said Billy, as we
reached him by one of the loop-holes in
the stone widl." " Got some skin oil and
a bitbruised."
" Why, we thought you were half
killed," we said.
" Not I," he replied gruffly; "the rope
caught over one of the crockets, audtha1;
broke my fall."
" Going to try again ?" said Joey, with
a sneer.
"No, I ain't going to try agaiu,
neither," said Bill, gruffly. " I left the
rope up at the top there, thinking you
were so clever you'd like to go."
"Oh, I could doit if I liked," said
Joey.
" Only you daren't," said Bill, rub
bing his elbows, and putting his lips to
his bleeding knuckles.
" Daren't I ?" said Joey.
And without another word he pushed
by Billy, and went on steadily up toward
the top of the tower.
"Ihopehe'Jl like it,"saidBilly, chuck
ling. "It ain't so easy as bethinks.
Let's go down. I'm a good bit shook."
Poor fellow, he looked rather white
as he got down, and to our surprise on
looking up on hearings cheer, there was
Joey hard at work with the rope over
his shoulder, climbing awoy, the lads
cheering him again aud agaiu as he
climbed higher and higher, till he at last
reached the great copper support of the
weathercock, aud then, he clung there
motionless for a few minutes, and we
began to think he had lost his nerve
and was afraid to move.
But that wasn't it he was only gath
ering breath ; and we gave a cheer in
which Billy Johnson heartily joined ; as
np there looking as small as a crow, the
plucky fellow gave the weathercock a
spin round afterwards holding on by his
legs, clasped round the copper support,
while he took the rope from his shoul
ders, undid the loop, and then tied it
securely to the great strong support.
All this time be had had his straw hat
on ; and now, taking it off, he gave it a
skim away from him ; and away it went,
right out into space, to fall at last far
irom the loot of the tower.
Joey now began to come down very
slowly and carefully, as if the coming
down was worse than the going up, and
more than once he slipped ; but he had
a tight hold of the rope with one hand
and that saved him, so that he only
rested, and then continued to come down.
You seo the spire sloped so that he
did not hang away from it, but against
the stone sides ; and so we went on
watching him till he was about half
way down, when he stopped to rest,
and, pulling up the rope a bit as he
held on to the rope, so as to rest his
legs.
We gave him another cheer.and so did
Parson, who just then came np, when
Joey waved his hand.
As he did this, something occurred
which took away my breath ; for, poor
i-- . i . ,. i . . .
ienow, no BBciut-u w sup, ana, Deiore he
could utter a cry, he turned over and
hung head downward, falling, with his
leg slipping through the loop, till his foot
caught, and he hung by it, fighting hard
for a few moments to get back, but in
vain ; aud as we watched him his strug
gles grew weaker, bo that be did not turn
himself up so fur in trying to reach
the loop where his ankle was caught ;
and at last he hung there, swinging
gently to and fro, only moving his
hands.
By this time Parson, I, and two more
had got to the belfry door, and we ran
panting up the dark staircase till we got
upon the leads.
" Hold on, Joey," I shouted. " I'm
coming."
" Make haste," he cried back. " I'm
about done."
By this time I was about ten feet up,
aud climbing as hard as I could, for
getting all the danger in the excitement;
for I don't think I should have dared to
go up on another occasion.
" Look sharp," said poor Joey. " It
seems as if ali my blood was rushing into
my head."
I leaned over and got hold of the rope
close to his ankle, but do anything more
I could not. I had all the will in the
world to help the poor fellow, but it
took all my strength to keep myself from
falling, aud as to raising my old com
panion, I neither had the strength nor
the idea as to how it could be doue.
The only way out of the difficulty
seemed to be to take out my knife and
cut the rope and thcu the poor fellow
would be killed.
"Come down 1" cried a voice below
me.
And looking toward the leads, there
was Parson stripped to the shirt and
trowsers, and with a coil of rope over
his shoulder for the new well rope had
proved to be long enough to let him cut
off some five and thirty feet.
" Don't leave me," groaned Joey, who
was half fainting. " I feel as if I should
fall any minute. I say, lad, this is very
awful'
"Here is Parson coming up," I said.
And so it was, for he went to the row
of crochets on the other side of Joey,
who now hung looking blue in the face,
and with his eyes closed.
" Ho must make haste make haste,"
he moaned softly.
I stopped holding on, while Parson
climbed up quicker than either of us
had done it, drawing himself up by his
arms iu a wonderful way until he was
abreast of us two me holding on and
Joey hanging on by one foot.
As soon as Parson reached us, he said
a few words of encouragement to Joey
who did not s.iy a word, and then climb
ing 'higher, tied the short rope he car
ried, to the long rope just above the loop
knot which held Joey's ankle. Then,
coming down a little, he tied his rope
tightly around Joey just under the arm
pits. " That will bear yon, my lad. But
catch fast hold of it with your hands,
while I cut your foot free."
Climbing up higher once more, he pull
ed out his knife, opened it with bis
teeth, and then began to saw through
strands of the loops that held Joey's
aukle, until there was a snap, a jerk,
and a heavy swinging to and fro, for the
poor fellow had fallen two or three feet,
and was now hanging by the rope round
his breast, right way upwards.
He did not make any effort for a few
minutes, as cheer after cheer eame to ns
from below, he swung there, with us
holding ou for dear life.
" Can you climb down now, Ranee,"
said Parson, " if I cut you free ?"
" No, sir," ho said hoarsely. " I've no
use iu my arms or loga they're all pins
and needles."
"Then we must lower you down," said
Parson, calmly.
And getting hold of the long piece of
rope, he climbed up once more, as
coolly as if ho was on an apple tree iu
his own orchard, aud saw that the knots
were fast; then, coming down, he passed
the long rope through the one round
Joey's breast, and tied it again round
him.
" Now," he said, " Fincher and I will
hold ou by this rope, you can let him
work it over his head," and then, with
Parson striding across from the crochets
at one angle to those on the other, and
me holding on the rope as well, we let
him down sliding, with his back to the
stone till his feet touched the leads, when
he fell down all of a heap.
" Untie the rope," said Parson, "aud
get him down."
He spoke very hoarsely, shouting to
them below; and a cheer came up.
" Now, Fincher," said Parson, "we've
got to get down."
As he spoke, he made a running nxse
iu the rope with the end he held in his
hand, let it run up to the big noose, and
pulled it tight.
Then he mode an effort to get his legs
together on one angle; bat the distance
he had been bending was too great, and
he couldn't recover himself, swung
away by his hands.
"I can't help it, Fincher I must go
first" he cried.
And he was already sliding down the
rope as he spoke; but I was so unnerved
and giddy now that I dared not look
down.
I believe I quite lost my head then for
.a few moments; for I was clinging there
for life a hundred and twenty feet above
the ground, aud the wind seemed to be
trying to push me from my hold.
I was brought to myself, though, just
as the landscape about me seemed to be
spinning round, by feeling the rope
touch my side; aud I clasped it convul
sively with both bauds, and then, wind
ing my legs round it, slid rapidly dowu.
the rope seeming to turn to fire as it
passed through my bands.
A few moments later, and I was safe
on the tower leads, trying like the rest
to smile at the danger we bad passed
through : but it was a faint, sickly
kind of a smile, and we were all very
glad to get down to the green, aud
cared nothing for the cheers of the peo
ple. The rope was left hanging there, and
stayed till it rotted away ; but somehow
before a week was out that weather
cock stopped squeaking, as if some one
had been up to oil it, and, though noth
ing was said about it, I've always felt as
sure that Parson weut up himself and
did it early one morning before any one
was up.
He was cool-headed enough to do it,
for ha nertainlv saved Joe Ranee 8 lile,
snd I know no one in the village would
have done it without bragging after. At
all events, the weatheroook was oiled,
and as I said over and over again to
Joeyt "If Parson didn't oil flint
Weathercock, who did j
TAMING WILD AKISIALS.
How I.lona anil Tlarcin are Tamed-The
Mecrets of a Dangerous Profession.
A New York Herald reporter has in
terviewed a tamer of wild animals with
the following interesting result; Ac
cording to the best beast trainers, no
wild beast can ever be trusted, not even
the so-called "noble" lion. They are
all treacherous, the females generally
being more deceitful and dangerous than
the males. The lioness is more difficult
to manage than the lion, the tigress than
the tiger. Kindness that is anything
but ordinary kindness or M civility " is
absolutely thrown away upon a wild
beast. It has occasionally some little
effect upon a lion, but really very sel
dom, the lion being really a surly and
treacherous brute, all lion stories and
talk to the contrary notwithstanding.
But with a tiger, and especially a ti
gress, all affection is literally wasted. A
tigress is as likely to eat you up after
six years of attention on her as after six
days, if she only fancies she is safe in so
doing. In all professional intercourse
with wild animals you must depend on
fear only absolute fear, i Let the beasts
know that you can and will beat them
when they deserve it and they will not
hurt you.
Never trust them for a moment. Keep
your eye on them all the time not that
your eye alone will have any effect upon
them. All these stories in books about
"eyeing animals "into submission and
the power of the human eye over the
brute creation are sheer fabrications.
An I as a rule the whip is the most effi
cacious of instruments iu trainiug or
subduing a wild beast. It can be used
quickly and at once, and it hurts every
time. So the beasts learn to dread it
even more than a gun more than any
thing save a red hot bar of iron or a fire.
" I depend more on my whip when I go
iu among my tigers," Baid the reporter's
informant, "than upon .myself. If I
were to drop my whip the beas'-s would
fancy I had lost all my power, and
would pounce first npon the whip, then
upon me. I would consider the drop
ping of my whip while in the cage with
my animals as almost a fatal calamity.
'" To train a wild animal," said Mr.
Still, "you must first make his or her
ncquitintance from the. outside, doing
chores around the cage and getting the
animals acquainted with your face and,
above all, with your voice. They re
member voices more acutely than they
do faces; they are governed more by
sound than by sight. Once I had a
beast in my cage that had not seen me
in my red suit that I wear when per
forming. When I entered with it on the
brnte did not recognize me .and would
undoubtedly have Bpmng on me aud
torn me to pieces had I uot shouted to
her in. my ordinary tone of voice. She
remembered me at once and slunk down
submissive.
"The trainer feeds his beast and gives
them water. These acts give him no
hold ou their gratitude, but they serve
to render his face, form and voice
familiar. They serve as an introduction
to tiger society. , But you must always
watch your beasts well, whether outside
or inside the cage. In fact, I think,"
said Mr. Still, " that you are most iu
danger when on the' outside. You do
not realize their proximity and they do
not realize yours they have not quite
the same fear of your whip when separ
ated from you by the bars, and so they
are ready to go tor you at any moment.
The four tigresses here at the circus
have bitten repeatedly people who came
too near their cages. Une young man,
doing chores around the cage not long
ago, was seized by the hair of the head
by one ot the beasts and nearly scalped.
Another had his arm broken bv a
wrench.
Having got accustomed to your
beasts and your beasts acoustomed to
you, your next step is to train them to
do their tricks. These tricks are very
simple, but they require a good deal ot
time and a good deal of whipping to ac
complish. " The lions are the smartest of the
wild beasts. You can train a lion to do
the ordinary tricks iu trade jumping
through hoops and over gates, standing
on hind legs, and so on in about five
weeks' constant work. In this time-table
of wild beasts you can estimate that it
would take a lioness about a week
longer, and a leopard, which comes next
in intelligence to a lion, about six weeks
to learn the same feats. The tiger
would take about seven or eight weeks,
a tigress about eight or nine weeks.
while you can keen on beating and
teaching a hyena for about four months
betore yon con do much with him.
" The most difficult feat of all to teach
a wild beast is to teach him how to let
vou lie ou him without his eatinsr von.
I do this every night with one of the ti
gresses, but she don t like it a bit,
though she keeps quiet enough, for it
aggravates her inwardly.
"The great secret of tiger taming and
all wild beast taming," continued the ti
ger tamer, "lies in the whipping of the
animals knowing just when to whip
them and inst how much. You must
keep them well whipped, but if you whip
them either too little or too much, or
whip them without cause, it may be
fatal. As for positively taming a wild
beast you can t do it especially a tiger.
One or two men may have more or less
influence over an animal, but no one is
absolutely safe with them, and no wild
beast was ever absolutely tamed. Food
makes but little difference with any wild
beast as to its natural ferocity, and with
a tiger it makes none at all My ani
mals would tear a man limb from limb
after a full meal just for the fun of the
thing. On the other bond I would lust
as lief enter their cage before a meal as
after it; in fact, I do enter it to perform
just betore feeding time in the afternoon,
Once I was obliged to keep them with
out food for four days, crossing from
England to France, and yet I performed
them before I fed, them on the fourth
day. On Sunday we do not feed the ti
gresses at all. so as to keen them from
sour stomach aud indigestion; yet on
Monday before feeding time I perform
them. The mere amount of food has
very little to do with their behavior,
Thirst excites them more than huncei-
Each of my tigers drinks about a pail of
water a day and consumes about ten
pounds of meat."
"There is this difference between a
tiger and. a lion," soul our euoyolop4ia
of wild beast lore. "A Hon will tear
you out of spite and temper occasionally,
but a tiger attacks you only for sheer
love of blood. A tiger's olawB, too, are
even sharper than a lion s. The leo-
Eard's claws are less sharp, while a
yena's foot is like a dog's, clawless, the
hyena's strong point being, like a scold
ing woman's, in the jaw."
Having now pretty well exhausted the
subject of wild beast taming and train
ing a concluding word may here be said
as to the pay of the professional wild
beast tamers. This is much smaller
than is generally supposed, ranging
from $160. to $100 a month. Consider
ing the risks of life and limb these men
doily take and the fact that there are not
fifty of them altogether in the world,
this would seem scanty compensation.
But the men themselves seem satisfied,
and there appears to be a wild bizarre
fascinatiou about this wild beast life,
which, like the love of ait in a fine
artist, is its own, even if it is often, its
only reward.
BUFFALO PEMMICAX.
How Hie Indians Manufacture Ill's Article
or Food.
A correspondent of the Chicago Times,
writing from Winnipeg, thus describes
the manufacture of pemmican by the
half breed hunters of Manitoba :
Buffalo pemmican is essentially a
British American provision; for, not
withstanding the vast annual slaughter
of the herds in the United States terri
tories, no pemmican is made. The ar
ticle furnished the English Arctic ex
peditions under the name of pemmican,
differs from the true provision in being
made of beef, and preserved by means of
spices and salt. JiuHalo pemmican con
tains no salt, and is mode from the dried
flesh of the animal. It is the product
of the summer hunt, though a consider
able amount is bIbo made iu the early
part of the fall hunt, before the cold is
sufficient to keep the green meat from
tainting.
To manulacturo it, the meat is nrst
cut into thin slices, then dried either by
hro or iu the sun, alter which it is
pounded or beaten out into a thick, flaky
substance by means of wooden flails and
poles. In this state it is placed in a bag
made from the raw hide of the animal,
about the size and shape of a half-barrel
flour sack. A quantity of Buffalo
fat or tallow having been boiled iu a
caldron, is now poured while hot over
the dry pulp in the bag, and the whole
stirred together until thoroughly mixed.
The quantity of .fat going into the bag
about equals in weight that of the pulp,
generally fifty pounds, the bags averag
ing one hundred pounds each. When a
particularly nice article is desired about
ten pounds of sugar and June or service
berries are added. As soon as the con
tents of the bag cools it becomes very
hard, the whole composition forming the
most solid description of food that man
can make. The bag is then sewed up
and laid in store, or ready for immediate
use. It is calculated that, on an average,
the carcass of one buffalo in fair condi
tion will yield enough fat and dried meat
to fill one bag with pemmican. As a
traveling provision it is simply in
valuable. There is no risk of spoiling
it, if ordinary care be taken to keep it
free from mould; there is no assignable
limit to the time pemmican will keep.
As to its taste, I never met any two men
who entertained exactly the same opin
ion. I should feel inclined to say, if
asked the question, that it tasted like
pemmican, there being nothing else in
the world that bears to it the slightest
resemblance. There have been people
who were candid enough to say they
found a resemblanco in sawdust mixed
with melted tallow candles, others,
again, who suggested the close approxi
mation of chips and boarding house but
ter, with plenty of hair thrown in to
hold the compound firm. I am willing
to acknowledge that much of the pem
mican made would be the better of a
comb, but after years of experience in the
use of it, i am not able to pronounce
upon i!s flavor. Nevertheless, there is
no iorin ot food that possesses anything
like its sufficing quality. A dog that
will eat from four to six pounds of fish
per day, when at work in harness, will
eat but two pounds of pemmican if fed
only upou that food. Pemmican may
be prepared iu many ways for the table,
but it is a matter of individual taste as
to which method is the least objection
able. There is rubaboo and richot, and
pemmican plain and pemmican raw
tins last being the form most in vogue
among the voyayeura. The richot, how.
ever, will be found the most palatable.
Mixed with a little flour or potatoes and
onions, aud fried in a pan, pemmican in
this form cau be eaten ; that is, provided
the appetite is good and there is nothing
else to be had.
A Corset Liver."
The Cincinnati Commercial says
Some medical students in one of the col
leges of this city, dissecting a female
subject a few days ago, found what is
called in doctors' parlance a "corset
liver." When tight lacing has been
practiced through several years, a per.
manent dent or hollow is produced in
the liver, which may be seen very plainly
after the woman is dead and her Liver
dissected out. This kind of liver ocenrs
so frequently in women that physicians
nave given it the name of " corset liver.
Iu the subject mentioned the hollow in
the liver was large enough for the wrist
of a grown man to be laid in it. Youner
ladies who don't want their Livers put
into the newspapers and made an awful
example of after they are dead, would
better take warning.
He Didn't Know the Difference.
" See here, Parker, what's the differ
ence between a ripe watermelon and
rotten cabbage ?" asked one letter carrier
of another the other day.
" You've got me there. I don't know,"
he returned with a look more puzzled
than an illiterate man at a cross roads
guide-board.
" Then you'd bf a mighty nice man to
send after- a watermolon, you would,"
remarked the quizzer as he moved on.
Cincinnati Jireakfast Table.
" Call me pet names something typi
oui oi swoei sounds, ne murmured, un
sl) said he was a gay lute,
FARM, (JAR DEN AND HOUSEHOLD.
Recipe.
A Good Plain Pie Crust. Sift one
quart of flour into a bowl ; chop into the
flour (using a chopping-knife) one-half
pound of good firm lard ; chop until
very fine ; pour in enough ice-water to
make a stiff dough, and work it with
your hands ; flour your hands ; work
your dough into shape ; handle it quick
ly and as little as possible ; flour your
pastry-board, and roll out your dough
very thin ; always roll from you ; have
ready one-half pound of good butter
that has been washed in two or three
cold waters to rid it of salt ; spread the
dough with butter; fold it up, then
roll it out thin again ; spread again
with butter ; fold again, and repeat the
operation until the butter is all UBed up.
To Roast Coffee. If you desire to
have extra fine flavored coffee, buy the
green coffee pure Java. Pick it over,
wash it well, drain it and spread it out
on pie pans ; roast it in a moderate
oven, or on top of the range : stir it
often to keep it from burning, and roast
it until it is a good brown ; then drop a
small piece of butter in each pau and
mix it up just enough to make the coffee
shine ; grind it fresh every morning.
The flavor will then equal, if not excel
the " Vienna" coffee.
Calves' Feet. Boil them until
tender ; cut them in two, taking out the
larger bones. Season with pepper aud
salt and sweet marjoram, and dredge
well with flour; fry a light brown in
lard and butter mixed. Serve with
parsley sauce.
Chackers. Butter, one cup ; salt,
one teaspoon ; flour, two quarts. Rub
thoroughly together with the hand, and
wet up with cold water ; beat well, and
beat iu flour to make quite brittle and
hard ; then pinch off pieces and roll out
each cracker by itself, if yon wish them
to resemble baker's crackers.
Poultry Gravy. Poultry should be
picked and drawn as soon as possible ;
never allow it to remain over night
undrawn, for the flavor of the craw and
intestines will penetrate the whole fowl ;
never cook it in less than eight hours
after it is killed ; after drawing a turkey
rinse it out with several waters, and at
the last mix iu a half tcaspoonful of
pulverized borax ; the inside of the
turkey is sometimes a little sour, and
will flavor the dressing ; the borax will
act as a corrective ; fill the turkey with
this water and let it remain while you
prepare your dressing ; wheu the dress
ing is ready pour out the borax water,
and if you wish rinse the turkey out
with clear water ; in roasting, if your fire
is good and turkey young and tender.
allow ten or twelve minutes to a pound ;
baste otten. first with melted butter
and hot water, afterward with the gravy
in the pan : wash the giblets well and
chop them up fine ; boil in just water
enough to cover, and when the turkey
is done place it ou a heated dish ; add
tho chopped giblets with the water in
which they were boiled to the drippings
in the pan ; thicken with a spoonful of
flour wet, to prevent lumps ; boil up
once ; pour into a gravy-boat ; serve
the turkey with craubeiry sauce. In
making gravy of any kind, if the meat
or poultry is very fat, it must be nkim-
med on before adding the hour.
Medical Hints.
Sour Stomach. A sufferer from want
of appetite and sour stomach can be
greatly benefited by leaving all medi
cines alone and for a time existing en
tirely on milk and lime water; a tuble
spoouful of lime water to a tumbler of
milk. If this disagrees iu any way, in
crease the quantity of lime water.
How to Get Fat. Abstain from the
nee of tea, coffee aud tobacco, and acids
of all kinds; take a sponge bath daily,
and dry with a coarse towel, using plenty
of friction to promote the general cir
culation of the blood; then consumo with
your meals a large bowl of oat-meal por
ridge with fresh milk.
How to Get Thin. Take regularly
three timeB a day in a little water fifteen
drops of hydrate of potassium always
alter meals and a little moderation in
eating will help.
Relief fob Asthma. One to two
tablespoonfuls of syrup of rhubarb.
Neuralgia Remedy. Extract of gel-
semin (yellow jessamine,) five to ten
drops, in about a tablespoonful of water;
three doses taken at intervals of an hour
apart, not sooner, have relieved very
severe attacks.
Coat ot an Aero of Wheal.
A correspondent of the Ohio fann
er gives the following estimate of the
cost of growing wheat. He Bays : We
will now take a 10-acre lot and see what
it costs to raise aud put a crop of wheat
into market, aud what profit when thero
is a yield of fifteen bushels per acre :
Plowing tu acres, eight days, at four dol
lars per day 1 12 00
Harrowing over twice, two inds ball day.. ID 00
1 inning wucat, oue aim a quarter aaya... , ) w
Heed wheat, fifteen bushels, at (1.23 IN 7S
Harveatiug, at two dollars )ei- acre 24 00
1 hraebiug, 151 buabels, at ten vents yec
buthel IS CO
Hulling wbeat to barn II ro
Cleaning and hauling to market. tl 00
Total tU2 76
We have now a total cost for the ten-
acres of $112.75, and a cost per acre of
eleven dollars and twenty-seven nud one
half cents.
A Trap for Bank Thieves.
The Scientific American thus de
scribes a recent invention for catching
thievos : The object of this invention is
to provide for use in banks, stores, etc.,
a thief or robber trap, so constructed
that it may be tripped by tho cashier,
proprietor, clerk, or other person sta
tioued behind the counter, or in any
other convenient place, and therebj pre
cipitate the thief or burglar into the cel
lar or apartment below. The tilting sec
tions constitute that part of a banking
room which is iu front of the counter.
On removing the support of levers from
the tilting sections they will tilt and pre
cipitate any one standing thereon into
the cellar or apartment below. It is
hence within the power of the cashier,
clerk, or other person' having access to
the tripper, to tilt' the sections when
ever a robber has gained access to the
bank or store, and thus precipitate him
into a place of seouro confinement with
out 'Incurring the danger of wvenual
fuoonuter ana ipjm'v.
Items of Interest
Everything we add to our knowledge
adds to our usefulness.
One of the greatest wonders in this
world is, what becomes of all the smart
children.
The under secretary for India esti
mates the cost of the Indian famine at
855,000,000.
Ohio has 881,000 acres of apple or
chards, and raised this year 15,000,000
bushels of apples.
The editor who saw a lady making
for the only empty seat in a car found
himself " crowded out to make room for
more interesting matter."
Simkins playfully remarked to his
wife that he had four fools: beautifool,
dntifool, youthfool, delightfool. " Poor
me I" said she ; " I have but one."
Dnricg his long reign the Pope has
founded 130 bishoprics. In Europe
there are 5ft5 prelacies ; iu America, 7!i ;
in Africa, 11 ; in Asia, 10 ; and in Aus
tralia, 21.
An American tourist says that a San
Domingo revolution consists of ' a few
yells, three or four hoots, some one
accidentally wounded, and come home,
darling ail is forgiven."
There are some seven hundred carpet
making establishments iu the United
States, which in prosperous times fur
nish employment to between 150,000
and 200,000 operatives men, women and
children.
Barnum is said to have remarked, as
he looked at a California artist's paint
ing of a cow : ' Good gracious 1 do you
mean to tell me that's from life? If
there is really such a strange beast in
existence, I'll have it for my show, if it
costs $10,000."
A band of robbers, lying in wait in
Nevada for a stage in which a large
amount of treasure was to be shipped,
were informed of the departure ot the
vehicle from Eureka by a confederate's
Bignal fire on the top of a mouutaiu
newly thirty miles distant. This fire
also excited suspicion, and a guard was
sent to protect the stage. A desperate
encounter was the result, and the rob
bers were all killed or captured.
A sturdy vagabond, with full black
beard of unusual length, was recently
brought before a London magistrate,
who questioned him about his past life.
"If one con believe all that is
laid to your charge," said the judge,
solemnly, "your conscience must be
as black as your bea-d." "Ah," re
plied the wily rogue, "if a man's con
science is to be measured by his benrd,
then your lordship has no conscience at
all."
ADAM'S WEDDISG.
Though Adam and Eve were full young to wed,
They managed the matter right wolf s
No arrangements were made, thero was uo vain
parade,
No "Jenkins" the story to tell.
Their wedding was quiet as quiet could be,
They cooked no provisions to waste,
And to wed iu a garden among the greon trees
Was surely the height of good taste.
Would it not be relief to our anxious mammas
If simplicity sweet could revive ?
Twould be cant in the pockets ot harassed
papas,
And young men would be eager to wive.
No costly outfit, no big frosted cake,
No pare about jewel or glove ;
There would bo no reception and no bridal
tour
There would only be Eden and love.
Yiiuderbilt's Second Marriwre.
At the time of Commodore Vander-
bilt's second marriage, says a writer m
the Buffalo Commercial Aaveruaer, a
lady acquaintance gave me its history as
an evidence of superiority of feminine
cleverness and finesse. Years ago there
lived in a Southern city a shrewd, clear
headed widow with one daughter, who
by the death of her husband was left in
limited, though comfortable circum-.
stances. A worthy youug gentleman
courted and espoused the daughter, who
was especially devoted to her mother.
Iu fact, the devotion was bo intense that
first a separation aud finally a divorce
were the resultB. The mother visiting
here Mrs. Vauderbilt, the commordore's
first wife, who as I recollect was a dis
tant relation, added so much to the hap
piness of the family that she was begged
to remain, which she did, and alter the
death of Mrs. Vauderbilt suffered so
much from lonoliues that she sent for
her daughter. It was not a very loDg
time afterward that the mother and
daughter returned to their Southern
home ; nor did many moous wax and
wane before Commodore vaucieroin;
jumped into a special car, with ft special
engine attached, and with a trusted
friend was whirled westward ot a mile a
minute pace until they reached London,
Oat., and after a happy meeting and a
brief marriage service, he was whirled
eastward again with his wife, the beau
tiful daughter, who hau journeyed from
the South with her mother to the tryst
ing place in London.
Words of Wisdom.
Fortune and the sun make insects
shine.
Every ruin drop which unites the
mountain produces its definite amount
of heat.
"Forgetting the things that are be
hind, press forward." Excellent advice
to a mule.
Mediocrity, with concentration aud
application, w ins oftener than great tal
ent diffused about in the speculative air.
The world is all ready to receive talent
with open arms. Very often it does not
know what to do with genius. Talent ia
a docile creature. It bows its head
meekly while the world slips the collars
over it. It backs into the shafts like a
lamb.
It is with glory as with beauty ; for as
a single line lineament cannot make' a
handsome face, neither can a single good
quality render a mau accomplished j 'vu
a concurrence of many fine features bjJ
good qualities makes true beauty and
true nonor.
All confidence which is not absolute
and entire is dangerous. There are few
occasions where a man ought either to
sen all or conceal all, for, liow little
soever yon have revt aled of your secret
to a friend, yon have already said too
much if you think it not wife to make
Mi4 priv to, All particulars,
V-