I The Behrend Beacon Behrend students do You Tube By Neil J. Peters asst, college life editor njpSOXtO psii.edu When most people think of You Tube sensa tions. they think of such videos as Bo Burnham's New Math. Charlie the Unicorn. My New Haircut, and the dude who got tasered at the John Kerry Speech. Such web-legend;, have been chronicled into the annuls of Internet history as some of the funniest images a person could see without wetting themselves. But. did you know that there are many up-and coming You Tube sensations on this very cam pus? It's true! Several of our very own Niltany Lions are on the fast track to You Tube stardom. The "Related Videos" box is overflowing with tags such as Behrend. PSB. or Drunk. (And generally all the really funny videos include that last D-word.) You Tube them if you don't believe me! Wait! Wa Not so fast order to sa you some your valuab! time that cou be put to beti use doing c lege thing (i.e.: Studyin 1 homewor drinking, peei, on couchi whilst in drunken stup< etc.): I've cot piled a list the best ai brightest videi on the Please unt * Students display innovation with creative trash disposal Sports and Skill Videos 1. Pong Trick Shots PSB Legendary: First on my list is a video filled to the brim with sweet skill and a side of awesome. Watch in awe as our intrepid heroes Zack. Jon. Pat. Kevin make some of the cra/iest shots you've ever seenl These guys really know how to han dle some balls. They can do anything. Bounce it off an ironing hoard? Ricochet it against a wall, overhead light, and several pieces of fur niture? Not a problem! If you can manage to watch this video and not drop your jaw. you are officially more of a man than I am. 2. PSB EPIC PONG SHOTS: It s pretty much the same as number 1. Onlv it has even Whiskey Chronicles By Matthew Schwabenbauer college life editor mjss3B7(" pMi.edu Many Behrend students visit Niagara Falls at some point during their time at our school. Despite the world-renowned landmark, most of our students aren't there for sightseeing. They go for one reason: a drinking age of 19. You could consider it our Mecca. When going to Niagara Falls, most people expect a fun night ahead of them. Go to some bars, meet some new people, get black-out drunk. You know, the usual stuff. One thing you never expect to happen is to be restrained by bouncers at a nightclub while the owner is throwing haymakers at your teeth. Such a tragedy occurred to one of my friends, who. for the purposes of this article we will refer to as Striker. One summer night. Striker and some of his friends decided to take a trip to Niagara Falls to drink at some bars and casinos. Upon crossing the border, the group was not three blocks into Canada before they stopped at a beer distributor. After checking into their hotel. Striker and his friends drank a few beers and then headed to a bar. In the hour Striker and his crew were at this bar, they ended up doing five yaeger bombs and decided it w as a good idea to go to a casino. Now, Striker doesn't like to gamble, so he just sat at the bar and drank the whole time and inadvertently got very drunk. After his friends Finished gambling, the whole group headed back to the bar. and it was at this point that the trouble began. In his own words, striker was "pretty ham mered” when they got back to the bar. Being the Cougar he is. Striker noticed a sixty-year old woman and decided to begin hitting on her. She was at the bar with her husband. In his drunken stupor Striker actually believed that this woman enjoyed being hit on. despite her husband being right next to her. so he began to rub her leg under the table. The woman didn’t reject Striker s advances, so he was convinced that he "was totally about to get laid.” It was then that Striker's friends inter vened and asked him what he was doing. Despite them advising against intimacy with a If you have a Whiskey Chronicle of your own vou'd like to see published, send it to mjss3B7(« l psu.edu, Tlw Hell rend Reman in no urn/ encourages underage drinking. , y y i~v iw r ri^i U ikjfJL J :_ cra/ier tricks and better musie. Cast includes: Brvan. Dave. Mike F. and Mike S. 3. psb beer pong: A parody of videos 1 & 2. Watch it after von see the others 4. Parking Lot Riding: Contrary to popu lar belief, you don't need mountains to ski. All you need is a four-wheel drive truck, a towropc. some guts, and a high tolerance for pain. The guys in this video have all of those things in spades. Watch in suspense as Sam and Erie go off sweet jumps at 50 mph while Tim and Brian drive. It's good clean fun. Campus Insanity 4. Penn .State Behrend - Dobbins: It's good, clean physical humor. Two dudes battle for kart riding supremacy, and like The Highlander, there can only be one. 5. Sled ride down Dobbins Stairwell: a once fun Childhood Activity+ Potentially Dangerous ist + be an engi neering major, because this video shows some serious innovation in waste disposal. I can’t tell you what happens because it will ruin the experience, but take it form me: after you watch this you'll he thinking, "why didn't I think of that ’" You Tube is truly a remarkable thing. It allows the average American to be creative and express oneself to the entire world. So please, 1 beg of you. put on your thinking caps and cre ate something spectacular with the awesome imaginative power we have been granted with... Or just get really wasted and tape your self doing something stupid. Either way, you might get a good result. sixty-ycar-old woman. Striker continued rub bing the woman's leg. Since everyone was very intoxicated at this point, the intervention was causing quite a scene. Enough of one for the club's bouncers to pull my buddy aside. The first thing the bouncers did was ID Striker, and when they found out he was 19 they were prepared to let him go Striker didn't like the bouncer questioning his age. so he began to mouth off. While my amigo was running his mouth, all the bouncer did was smile. The next thing he knew. Striker was being pushed through the bar by two bouncers holding his arms behind his back. Striker realized he was in a position where he could cause a scene and get a lot of attention so he took it. Striker started yelling at the bouncers, chal lenging them and telling them they were “big hardasses." and so on. The bouncers saw this as a good enough reason to retrieve the club’s ow ner to help quell the situation, but my friend decided to trash talk him as well. One thing led to another, and pretty soon the bouncers were holding Striker back as the bar’s owner was punching him in the head. Despite being obviously disenfranchised. Striker con tinued to call out the owner. “Oh what a big boy! Hit me with my arms behind my back. Let’s take this outside!" The bouncers listened and literally threw my comrade out of the club. Even though he had just been physically beaten. Striker continued to berate the bounc ers from outside of the bar while his friends held him back. Deciding enough was enough, one of the guys started to walk him back to the hotel. Unsurprisingly, Striker was blacking out at this point and not really remembering what happened. Once they were about halfway back to their hotel, Striker realized what he had done and instead of going back to the hotel, he turned around ran back to the bar before his friend could stop him. If you think that this night couldn’t have got ten worse for Striker, you are wrong. Find out how Striker faired in round two against the bouncers next week.. Write for the College Life page of The Behrend Beacon ome d y ild! If iu don’t lieve me. ;t notice lat the y in the ighy t irt places the rail at 0:44 c o n d s. pp 1 e id e r lybe? Taking the nn State Ben Stiller. Jack Black and Robert Downey Jr. play "dudes playing other dudes" in Tropic Thunder le: This man must Tropic Thunder trumps “I don't know what it’s called, 1 just know what sound it makes when it takes a man's life," growled Four Leaf Tayback (a scraggly Nick Nolte) when asked about his weapon. Tayback. a Vietnam veteran who lost his hands in the conflict, wrote a book (of the same name) about the suicide mission he went on. T\vo of the three other vets who went on the mission followed suit, but only Tayback got the movie deal. Tropic Thunder chronicles the disastrous attempt to bring Tayback's story to the silver screen. Taking a different approach than most movies in the genre. Tropic Thunder reveals the backgrounds of char acters through several parody commercials. The first features Alpa Chino, a rapper-turned-actor played by Brandon T. Jackson, in his “big-ballin" commercial for his energy drink Booty Sweat, which pokes fun at some of the more silly aspects of thug culture. Next, a fake movie trailer appears with Tugg Speedman (Ben Stiller), who is a washed up action star who held the title of the highest paid actor in the world. More recent ly, Speedman has been producing Hops, including an ill advised venture into serious acting in a film called Simple Jack. Jeff Portnoy (Jack Black), a mildly talent ed comedic actor with drug issues, then takes the screen for his fake movie Fatties. He plays multiple characters by himself, very similar to Eddie Murphy's The Nutty Professor but more prone to flatulence. Finally there is Kirk Lazarus, (Robert Downey Jr.), a 5-time Academy Award winning method actor who submerges himself so deeply in his roles (he underwent pigmentation alter ation to play the black character) that he doesn’t get out of character until after the DVD commentary. After we become friends with the main characters, the film gets down to business. Damien Cockburn. a fresh man director (Steve Coogan) is trying to grab hold of the reins of his star-studded cast, angry producer (Tom Jim Bobrowicz Please Join Us!! September 13 th 2pm^m E-mail Matthew Schwabenbauer at: mjss3B7@psu.edu By Michael Way staff writer nirw.S 133