Paige Miles, Editorial Page Editor
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The Behrend Beacon
,„,, ,„, „ ,( „
News Editor
Erin McCarty
Sports Editors
Scott Soltts
Zoe Rose
Editorial Page Editor
Paige Miles
Features Editor
Karl Benacci
Staff Photographers acon
Jeff Hankey
Heather Myers
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The Beacon is published
weekly by the students of
Penn State Erie,
the Behrend College;
First Floor, The J. Elmer
Reed Union Building, Station
Road, Erie, PA 16563.
The Beacon can be reached by
calling (814) 898-6488 or
(814) 898-6019 (FAX).
ISSN 1071-9288.
Letters to
the Editor
The reason I'm writing to the Bea
con is in response to the scathing and
downright nasty article written in the
Humor Page concerning people who
wear corduroy pants. I, in fact, love
wearing my corduroy pants and I
shouldn't feel discriminated against
for wearing them. I have already
missed• to'o many classes due to my
overwhelming feeling of depression.
My bottle of Zocor is almost empty
and my pillow is continually damp
from my continuous weeping into it.
I truly fear for myself when I walk to
class. I am always on edge for fear that
a hate monger from the Humor Page
might jump my ass just for wearing
corduroy pants. Or that a handful of
geeky Humor Page writers will come
to my apartment and harass me. My
fellow corduroy wearing troupe is
thinking of staging a walk out Friday,
November 8, at against the oppressive
forces that are the Humor Page. 1 will
provide the flares, war paint, and pie.
Anyone interested can email me at
birthdayboy@psu.edu. Together we
can stop the Humor Page from mak
ing asinine comments about dead ba
bies, supposed booze hounds, and
weight-challenged females. As you
can see I take everything in the Hu
mor Page as completely true and to
tally serious. Anybody who doesn't
take the Humor Page as pure fact is
an idiot. Peace Out... Stop the Hate
(Humor Page).
Jonathan Navonev
I wouldn't read the Beacon if it didn't
have the humor page. It figures that
the same type of people that would
complain about the humor page would
be the same people that would eat
Pizza with the Provost.
Muskrat
(Kevin D A-camel')
AIM getting
boring?
Type
something
productive--
write a letter
to the editor.
I:17 1= isk@l7 177
Interim Editor-in-Chief
Kevin Fallon
Managing Editors
Rebecca Weindorf
Robert Wynne
1 44
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Cathy Roan
The Beacon encourages
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that week's issue
merican women have achieved quality..
meone should tell the feminists
by Matthew Vadum Schuld's book looks at three dozen top
KRT Forum feminist organizations, ranging from the Na-
When someone is convinced that imagi- tional Organization for Women to the Ms.
nary forces are aligned against him or her, Foundation for Women to the League of
that person is sent for professional help. Yet Women Voters. The guide identifies how
when people sharing the same unfounded much feminist groups receive in government
beliefs get together and form an association, grants as well as in foundation and corporate
they often manage to win giwernment grants. grants.
A case in point is the modern feminist Schuld has examined the network of non
movement whose members carry on about profit organizations and pressure groups that
women's rights as if this were the year 1802, comprise today's feminist movement. She
not 2002. To them the so-called patriarchy, says that knowing how the movement works
a cousin of Hillary Clinton's vast right-wing helps explain its influence over public °pin
conspiracy theory, is perpetually in motion ion•
denying women their rights. For instance, the recent spate of news sto-
To remain convinced that American ties over the men-only membership policy of
women today are little better off than in the the private Augusta National Golf Club, the
early days of the Republic is quite a feat, sponsor of the annual Masters golf tourna
given that women today enjoy legal and po- ment, was propelled by press statements from
litical equality, outnumber men on many col- the National Council of Women's Organiza
lege campuses, serve in the military, occupy tions, a group claiming to unite 100 organi
top corporate positions, and sit in Congress zations representing more than six million
and on the Supreme Court. women. Yet the controversy, says Schuld, was
Nonetheless, feminists trudge on, con- generated almost single-handedly by Martha
vinced by their own propaganda. Their Burk, a well-connected Washington feminist.
movement today is dominated by left-wing Her "group" consists of little more than her
"gender feminists" who pump their limitless Rolodex and a fax machine.
anger into never-ending political fights. Chutzpah is obviously not in short supply
They are not interested in equal opportu- among groups such as NOW whose actual
nity, but insist on government- man d ate d grass-roots membership is dwindling.
equal treatment for women in all areas in Groups including NOW take taxpayer fund
society. The feminist movement in the 21st ing and then campaign for bigger and more
century sees every statistical disparity be- expensive government programs. Their lack
tween men and women as proof of sex-based of support among American women makes
discrimination and demands government their battle cries only louder.
regulations and programs to help end all sup- The feminists' current party line is that
posed inequalities. "George Bush and Republicans will 'turn back
To make matters worse, tax-exempt the clock' with their Supreme Court nomi
groups like the National Organization for nees," says Schuld. "Feminist groups have got
Women and the League of Women Voters, every white male member of Congress scared
which pack a political punch in Congress and to death. And they successfully threaten the
state legislatures, puff up their membership corporations that give them money," she says.
figures to enhance their credibility. Such Putting an end to feminists' delusional, tax
groups "systematically and regularly" over- payer-funded crusades may be an uphill battle.
state their membership, according to Kim- but with watchdogs like Schuld around, there
berly Schuld, author of the "Guide to Femi- is at least a chance of reining in a movement
nist Organizations," which was just published that was long ago hijacked by the extreme
by Capital Research Center, a Washington- left.
based watchdog group.
Advertising Managers
Melissa Powell
Christine Kieck
Calendar Page Editor
Erinn Hansen
Humor Page Editor
Ross Lockwood
Associate Editor
Jen Henderson
Distribution Manager
Scott So/Its
Technical Support
Doug Butterworth
PAUL WOISTOI4e.
He WAS KNOWN
FoR STANDM 6
UP FoR Ilie
Vine GOY.
Friday November 1, 2002
Senior daze
I remembered that I had a column to
write for this week on the day it was due.
I scheduled for the spring semester so
early that I have been able to change, re
change and then change back to rak
ing so many different cla
Now even I don't know what
taking in the spring, much les: 4 00,10: family, lam suppose to try get
registrar. i„, ". ,• ting into graduate school and/or
I have been known in a ''''"':::'''''i find a job that I can div e into
few instances to make my with my creative abilities and
weekend plans the Monday !, •••••:: '., ~' experience? Hopefully, that
before that weekend for ' ' -s' '''' wi ll happen. considering I al
the''' '''
''.
1"; O:; '!! ' fainted • - thinking
sole reason that I don't .: :!' ' \ 7." :i?::-:: `:.: most just
believe in waiting til the . ;1,, , i!: : ,:, : ;,: : t about and typing up that to
last minute to do anything! —,-, :' ' -.,,,- do list mentioned above.
My planner was so full that Christine Kleck Ido have to admit that
I had to buy a new one and
then color code events ac-
cording to their importance and/or affili
ation to my life.
Well, if you haven't guessed it by now
I am right smack dab in the middle of
my senior year. I am at the crossroads of
"college kid" and "full-blown adult," un
derstanding perfectly that the decisions I
make within the next seven months will
have a huge impact and could even dra
matically alter the rest of my life
Talk about being busy! I don't even
have time to consider senioritis an excuse
for procrastinating, because I don't have
time to procrastinate!
My classes are demanding so much
more out of me these days. I have opted
to consider each of them two classes,
rather than one, thus doubling my out-of
class study time and my stress which I
don't want to do right now!
DAM
WI AT The
BiG GUY
Lixes
ABOUT
HMI
TbO.
•
.0 11 '
.t
,
ir
In addition to the 20+ hours a week that I
put in at my part-time job, 15 class cred
its (which some days feel like 30), my re
sponsibilities to the Association for
Women in Communication, my
position on the Beacon staff and
my obligations to my friends and
quite a "rush - and that
rush has inspired me to do
my best with everything on that to-do list.
I don't know what it is, but I honestly think
that the busier and more stressed out I am.
the better I get at accomplishing tasks.
It's almost as it my success in life feeds
off a packed planner that leaves no room
for a moment to even breathe. Either that
or something somewhere in the recesses
of my brain is telling me that it all has to
be done and done well and that I may as
well just sit down, suck it up and do it.
Never before have I ever been given
such an adamant illustration of how stress
can he a good thing. I remember learning
about "u stress" in grade school and high
school health classes, hut never before
was I part of the example to apply to the
concept.
`Jackass' is almost as cool as Karl
11 .
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All in all, despite the workload, stress
by Karl Benacci
Features Editor
There aren't a lot of happy things on
television anymore. With the click of a
remote control one is often attacked with
a barrage of visual horror. such as the
evening news or shady cop shows like
"NYPD Blue" or "CSI Miami."
Why watch angry people on depress
ing shows? Instead, one should watch a
show v ith happy characters, such as
MTV's "Jackass. " This show appeared
on MTV two years ago and consists of a
group of guys who perform daring stunts
such as jousting on BMX hikes and get
ting shot with painthall guns.
The show is hilarious. and there isn't
any negativity in it. In fact, many indi
viduals could learn Inim the show, be
cause the "Jackass - cast is a tight broth
erhood which knows how to have fun as
opposed to a m4joritv of America, which
is angry and obese, like Dennis Franz.
Thanks to these negative people (the
censors), MTV can only get away with
showing certain things on television. So
MTV gave the "Jackass" cast a chance
to make a film.
I've seen the movie and yes, there are
some really gross things in it, which arc
secret I won't tell von, the reader.
Okay, okay! I will give one example
for those of you who are cool enough to
read my piece. In one scene, a nice young
chap named Ryan Dunn sticks a toy car
up his butt and has a doctor take an x
ray of his backside. Pretty silly, eh'?
Now, that I have begun talking about
the movie, I feel as if I cannot stop. So,
in another scene, Johnny Knoxville, the
star of the show, gets the pulp beaten out
of him by the professional heavyweight
boxer, Butterbean.
Does this sound stupid? Is "Jackass"
a bad movie that shouldn't be shown?
pressures and questions for my future, life
is just really good now. The stage and feel
ing of being "in-between" is kind of (for
lack of a better word) cool. There is so
much to look forward to, but yet so many
accomplishments to remember...and
well, just so much to-do right now. Which
reminds me, I better get hack to working
on the things on my to-do list - well I bet
ter get back to one of my to-do lists if I
can find it!
I would have to say that my quote on
my America Online instant messenger
profile best sums up my feelings on life
right now, so here it is: "My life is great.
I'm happy, healthy and strong. I've found
God and he is the cornerstone of my ex
istence. I'm on the brink of making some
major future-influencing decisions. yet the
youth of my childhood still exists. I've
got the most wonderful mother and two
brothers!
After attempts to find myself by trying
(and sometimes) not succeeding at a
plethora of things in high school and col
lege I've finally found my n iche and pas
sion in this world. It encompasses all of
the smaller parts of those past attempts to
find myself that I enjoyed most and did
the best with.
I have the hest friends ever. I have not
one enemy in this world and I've found
that I can't live without any of you and
that I will always have a place for each of
you in my heart.
I have learned that true and long-term
love is in the longing, if that person re
turns to you, and nothing about your love
has changed, it was meant to he!"
-Steve-0 can get a tattoo of
Bruno on his butt.
-Party Boy Chris Pontius
can dance in the window of
Reed 114 while there's a
concert in the Reed
Wintergarden.
-Wee Man can steal a main
tenance truck and have a
demolition derby with
Provost Burke's ride.
-Two words: the Gorge
I,
! , )
i.
i t
a;
~
-Johnny can dress up as
Bruno and run around
campus with his portrait.
When Johnny sees one of
his cast, he can smash the
painting over his cast
member's head.
The Behrend Beacon
Arc Johnny Knoxville and his friends
hunch of stupid idiots'?
If you say yes to this, you're the idiot.
I looked around that dark mo‘ ic theatre
and saw smiles on everyone's faces. Yes.
for an hour and a half, my movie-going
peers and I threw our troubles aside and
were happily entertained by a group of
close friends who only want to make the
world smile.
II - laughing and having a good time
watching some guys perlorm stunts that
hurt no one (other than themselves) is
wrong, then what's right? Let people
have their fun!
Some things
the cast of
'Jackass' can
do on the
Behrend
campus
by Karl Benacci
feature page ediun
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